I just read this on facebook posted by a friend of mine and it is HILLARIOUS!
Enjoy!!
Once again this year, I’ve had requests for my
Vodka Christmas Cake recipe so here goes. Please keep in your files as I
am beginning to get tired of typing this up every year! (Made mine this
morning!!!!) 1 cup sugar, 1 tsp. baking powder, 1 cup water, 1 tsp.
salt , 1 cup brown sugar, Lemon juice, 4 large eggs, Nuts, 1 bottle
Vodka, 2 cups dried fruit.
Sample a cup of Vodka to check
quality. Take a large bowl, check the Vodka again to be sure it is of
the highest quality then Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one
cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat
again. At this point, it is best to make sure the Vodka is still OK. Try
another cup just in case. Turn off the mixer thingy. Break 2 eggs and
add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the fruit up
off the floor, wash it and put it in the bowl a piece at a time trying
to count it. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the
beaters, just pry it loose with a drewscriver Sample the Vodka to test
for tonsisticity. Next, sift 2 cups of salt, or something. Check the
Vodka. Now shit shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one
table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash
the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't
forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the
window. Finish the Vodka and wipe the counter with the cat. ♥
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